Ego
by Foxy'sGirl
Summary: The long awaited sequel to Plans. Eight years after the end of Plans, at the celebration of a decade living with dragons, Hiccup finally realizes the vain perks that come with being a hero. On top of brewing rifts in the famous relationship, will Hiccup's sudden grasp of idol status be too much?
1. Chapter 1

**She's back…**

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Why is this happening again?

Astrid sits curled in her watchtower bathroom, holding the bloody cloth of her underwear and clutching her stomach, where the pain is centered. This can't be happening again. No. This one had been so close, it had been in its fifth month, longer than any of the others.

There's a knock at the wooden door and she hides the underwear reflexively, placing them behind her back.

"Mommy?" She sighs, and swallows hard. She can't let the tears through.

"Just a minute, Idunnr. I'll be out in a second." She hugs her knees to her chest, hard, and places her forehead against them, cringing at the rusty salt smell of blood that still hangs in the air. Three times is enough. She can't do this again.

She forces the stale air in and out of her lungs, too crumpled to stand up and open the curtain to let the stink out. She'd only told Hiccup last week, she'd wanted to wait until they were out of the danger zone. And then…she hadn't even been doing anything, and then all of a sudden a gush and a stabbing pain.

The front door creeks open, and she hears her daughter run across the room.

"Hey there honey, here all alone?" There's a little grunt as Hiccup hefts the seven year old up onto his shoulder, as is the routine when he gets home.

"Mommy's in the bathroom. She won't come out."

"How long has she been in there sweetie?"

"_Forever_." Her daughter exaggerates. "Pinkhorn started whining and then she disappeared." Astrid can hear the little purr of the Terrible Terror in question at the mention of its name. He's going to come in here isn't he. Oh gods, she doesn't want to go through this again. Can't she just—Can't it just be okay again? They were so happy.

"You play with Pinkhorn, I'm going to go and talk to Mommy." He says gently, and she doesn't need to see his face to know that he knows what's going on. A sob escapes as his fist raps on the door. "Astrid? Can I come in?" She sobs again and the door opens and closes before their daughter can see anything.

She looks up at him and pulls the underwear from behind her back, showing him the blood. He pales and sits down beside her, pulling her into his lap and tucking her into his chest, his chin on the crown of her head as he rocks her gently.

"I'm sorry—" She blubbers through the soaking sobs that are seeping into the green fabric of his shirt.

"Shh, it's not your fault. It's—When did it happen?" He asks quietly, his hand rubbing soothingly against her back and making her sob even harder.

"I wasn't even doing anything. I was just fixing that stupid dress that Pinkhorn keeps tearing and…and…and then it was gone." She sniffs, balling the bloody fabric into a tight little package and clutching it to her chest. They were just so close this time, so much further than the other times.

"It's okay." His voice is soothing, like he's talking to a skittish dragon, and she presses her face further into him. She needs to calm down so that they can get out there to their daughter. That first pregnancy had been fine, but there had been complications during child birth and ever since, this had been happening. Three times that they've known about, but who knows how many babies haven't made it long enough to be noticed. The thought makes her feel sick and dizzy and for a minute she thinks she might pass out, thinking of all of their precious little failures.

"I'm not doing this again. I'm going to the healer tonight to get the herbs." She'd been to the healer after the first glitch and the old woman hadn't been much help. Apparently her only two options for making absolutely sure that it doesn't happen again are denying her husband or drinking herbs that'll stop her monthly bleeding. The healer hadn't given her any hope that trying again would yield different results, but Astrid has always been extremely stubborn, and they wanted more kids.

This third time has finally broken the will to keep getting pregnant.

"Are you sure? You don't want to try anymore?" Astrid pulls her head back from his chest and glares at him, a bit desperate.

"It hurts Hiccup. It hurts every single time. I'm done." She pushes up off of his lap then, tucking the bloody underwear into the pocket of her skirt. He follows her standing up and taking her back into his arms.

"I know, it hurts me too. Do you want me to come with you? To the healer's?"

"No." She gives him an irrationally stony look and something deep in the foundation of their relationship snaps.

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**A/N: Idunnr: Viking name meaning "to love again," my inner romantic loved how adorable that was, like she's Hiccup's second love. **

**So…a wee bit heavier than Plans, to start, but trust me…It's going…everywhere. **

**Please leave a review, I'm nervous as heck about getting back into this, it's been so long, and I've been going through…well, a really tough year, but I miss the outlet, and the support, and the feeling of being good at something. **

**So feedback is much appreciated**


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's note: Finding my feet. Don't worry, this is going somewhere, I'm just not as good with the long chapters as I used to be, so it's a little shorter than the normal chapters will be. I just didn't want to wait too long to post and have everyone give up on me. **

**Again. **

**Enjoy.**

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One month later

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"Do we really have to go?" Hiccup pouts, pulling the heavy fur comforter up over his head, and curling into the warm mattress. His wiry arm wraps tighter around Astrid's waist as he pulls her down with him, tucking his face into her shoulder and nibbling along the neckline of her woolen nightgown. Astrid grins and mashes her palm against his forehead, further mussing his bedhead as she pushes herself out from under the covers into the cooler air of their bedroom.

Hiccup tugs her nightgown over her shoulder and sucks on her sharp collarbone. Astrid stretches luxuriously.

"Of course we have to go. The entire village is throwing a festival for you." Hiccup shrugs and starts tugging his wife's nightgown up over her thighs, running his palm along her flat stomach and making her shiver.

"The festival is for the dragons…" A nimble finger dips into Astrid's belly button and she twitches, closing her eyes and smiling. "Let Toothless do the publicity, he loves the attention." Hiccup's warm, searching lips trail up Astrid's neck and she weaves one hand into his hair, letting the soft strands tickle her fingers as she lets her head loll to the side.

"True…but your dad has been planning for weeks," Hiccup sucks on her earlobe and she loses her train of thought for a second, humming happily and hooking a lean leg over his hip, holding him close. "And Ruffnut is even coming in with Thuggery…"

"You write Ruffnut all the time."

"It's not the same as seeing her." When did her shirt come off? Astrid shivers at the warm body over her suddenly naked torso, lightly running her fingers over Hiccup's ribs.

"You can see her later. We'll go to Meathead…take a week, load up a drakkar, take Idunnr along…" It does sound nice, it's been way too long since Astrid's been anywhere. Everything this summer has been so busy, what with taking over training for hunters and all the new tack requests filling the smithy.

"That's another thing. Idunnr is really excited about the party, I told her she could bring Pinkhorn." Astrid kisses the top of Hiccup's head and pushes lightly on his shoulders, tracing constellations in the freckles sprinkled over his back.

Hiccup pouts.

"If we're late, she's going to make that face isn't she? The one with the lip?"

"The same one you're making now?" Astrid laughs, forcing Hiccup to crack a smile as she twiddles the offending lower lip with her index finger. "Yes. She will make this face. And if the face doesn't work, she will probably punch you, and you know what happened last time."

Hiccup blushes.

"The women in this house, always bruising me." Astrid grins, stroking the shady stubble along his jaw.

"We can't help it that you've got baby skin," She squirms the rest of the way out from under him and stands up, stretching upwards like a cat as her toes curl into the bearskin rug. Hiccup stares with a goofy smile on his face, and Astrid grins at him. "What?"

"Just wondering how I got the most beautiful girl," Hiccup crosses his arms behind his head, and Astrid grins at the definition in his lean arms, leaning down to kiss his bedhead. "Ever. The most beautiful girl ever," he adds, puckering his lips and successfully winning another kiss.

"Suck up," She stands up, punching him lightly in the shoulder. "But I love you anyway." Astrid grins as she trudges over to the shelves on the wall that hold their clothes, picking up a set of underwear and shimmying into it.

"I love you too. And we're finishing this later." Hiccup wiggles his eyebrows and Astrid can't help but wonder if his teenaged libido has something to do with his perpetually boyish face.

"Ooh, I'm so scared." She feigns in a sarcastically mocking way that only could have rubbed off from far too much time with her husband.

"Oh, you better be…" Hiccup gets out of bed, suddenly energetic as he straps his leg on and walks up behind his wife, wrapping his arms around her waist, still warrior narrow. "You know, the shop will be empty today, what with Gobber getting drunk with my dad and all…and I did get the table fixed after last week…" Astrid knows some women might laugh at Hiccup's perpetually knobby knees as they wobble in the chilly morning air, they might have some sort of qualm with the shallow angle of his narrow sinewy back, but as he slides his warm hands over her stomach and kisses the side of her neck, warm smugness slithers alongside arousal.

"Did you finally put iron legs on it? Like I keep on suggesting?"

"No, I made these knew nails though, I thought if I put kind of a spiral ridge on them to hold the wood…" The silken worded deviant of a few minutes before is gone, replaced by an adorably precise engineer and Astrid laughs, pressing her butt back against Hiccup and pulling his arms tighter around her.

"Come on Mr. Blacksmith, I thought you were seducing me, not boring me to death."

"I'm seducing you with my intellect," Hiccup quips, laughing "I thought you liked my _huge_ intellect—"

Bang. Bang. Bang.

"Mom. Come on! Make Dad get up, Pinkhorn wants to go! And Toothless wants breakfast!" Idunnr yells through the door and the hazy veil of pheromones shatters. Hiccup hugs Astrid tightly before stepping back and adjusting his underwear in the front with a sly grin.

"We're almost ready Hun, why don't you go ahead and get Toothless and Pinkhorn their breakfast?" Hiccup suggests, praying silently at the door as Astrid laughs lightly, shaking her head.

"Ewww! No. The fish are gross!" Astrid shrugs, like she'd been expecting the vehement denial…which she had been. For all of his sensitivity, Hiccup just doesn't understand the psyche of a seven year old girl.

"I told you, babe, we've got at least 3 years before dead stuff isn't gross anymore," Astrid whispers, tugging a green woolen dress over her head with a smirk. Hiccup rolls his eyes, the classic motion for 'watch this.'

"What if I promise to make Pinkhorn one of those halters you've been wanting?" Idunnr thinks this over, and Astrid can just imagine her pretending to stroke her imaginary goatee, which she's done ever since Hiccup made the awful decision to grow one out last winter. It was the best part of spring when he finally shaved that ginger mistake.

"Can it be shiny?" Idunnr wages, and Hiccup smirks.

"I think I can manage that. I'll measure her head tonight, ok sweetie?"

"I'll feed the dragons." Their daughter assents with a heavy sigh, and Hiccup waits until he hears the door shut behind her to take Astrid into his arms with a gap-toothed grin.

"While she's doing that," And suddenly his tongue is in her mouth and she's sixteen again until her hands find his ass and give it a squeeze and she gets onto tip toes and leans into him. Somehow her back ends up against the door as her hands find his hair, tugging lightly at the nape of his neck and crushing her lips more tightly to his.

Astrid has always felt like Hiccup's lips are some sort of realm of possibility, where she's suddenly soft and enticed by warmth. She lets herself loosen up in his arms as her tongue slides out to mingle with his own, he tastes like the honey he had on his bread before bed last night, and she moans gently against his lips guiding the smooth kissing into a frenzy of hands and harsh breathing against her cheeks.

A hot, callused hand slides up beneath her dress and she wraps her leg around the back of his knee and pulls him even closer, his ribs digging into her stomach as she runs her fingers over his shoulder blades. Hiccup gasps, and pulls away just enough for Astrid to move down, tracing scalding kisses over his jaw, as one hand slides over his stomach and down beneath the waistband of his underwear—

The front door slams, and a pitter patter of angry footsteps crosses the living room.

"I fed the freaking dragons! And one of the fish was still alive and it flopped around, and it was really gross!" Hiccup sighs, resting his forehead on Astrid's collarbone as her hands fly up to smooth his crazy hair. "I want Pinkhorn's collar to be shiny _and_ pink. Ok, Dad?"

"Ok, sweetie. I'm sorry the fish flopped around."

"Let's just go to the carnival, I saw Frostbite and her sister heading down there already, we're going to be the last ones there." Hiccup steps back, running a haggard hand over his forehead before giving his miserably erect dick a lamenting rub through his underwear. Astrid sighs and kisses his cheek.

"We'll be out in a couple minutes, make sure Pinkhorn is ready." Astrid pulls on her boots, loving the last few months of summer where she can leave her legs bare, before thick leggings become a restraining necessity.

"She's been ready her _whole _life." Even an extremely sexually frustrated Hiccup has to choke back a laugh at that.

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Berk feels more festive than Astrid can ever remember as they walk down the hill, Toothless on Hiccup's right while she holds his left hand. Idunnr runs ahead, half playing with Pinkhorn, and half making sure that she doesn't disappear into the crowd with her excitement. There really is a reason that they haven't let the young dragon journey into town before, and if it weren't for the dozens of other over-excited dragons, Hiccup would worry about her causing a riot.

Then again, it's not like riots are particularly uncommon on Berk, what with hundreds of Vikings and their massive, fire-breathing pets. Everyone stomps…not that far off from rioting to begin with.

As they approach the center of town, and the colorful flags waving from rooftops seem impossibly brighter, Hiccup visibly stiffens. Astrid squeezes his hand and glances over at him, finding the shifty inconsistent gaze and ruddy cheeks that she's come to associate with her husband being embarrassed about something.

"You're going to be fine," She sighs, wishing that Hiccup would realize that no one is expecting him to be anything more than he already is.

"How do you know?" Hiccup pulls his hand out of hers, wiping his tacky palm on his pants before wedging it deep in his pocket. Astrid hooks her arm through the crook of his elbow, because he's not getting away from appreciating himself that easily.

"Because all you have to do is show up," Hiccup grumbles and Astrid grips his arm more firmly. "Oh, and it would probably help if you don't become a murderer. That might make the day go more smoothly." She adds in a tactless attempt to make him laugh. A snort lets her know that it worked, and suddenly the arm under her grasp feels less like a tree limb.

"Aw really? I can't kill anyone?" The smile is back in Hiccup's voice as he nudges his bony hip against his wife's, almost tripping both of them. "But I'm so manly and enraged, I just want to smash skills. Should I just go back home? I mean, what kind of festival is it if the big hero can't murder anyone—" Hiccup coughs at the pointy little elbow Astrid jabs into his ribs.

Astrid laughs, reaching over and patting the sure to be bruising location, before prying his hand out of his pocket and interweaving their fingers.

"And I thought I was missing talkative Hiccup," He grins and wiggles free of her grasp, draping his long arm over her shoulders. He still can't help but be happy that he's taller than Astrid, and even though it's less of a surprise than a fact after 8 years of marriage, it's still his favorite senseless supremacy.

"Thanks babe."

Hiccup doesn't have to expand, Astrid knows what he's thanking her for. He's glad that she's the rock, thrilled she's the utilitarian scaffolding holding them both to Berk and the ground, as he's continually drawn upwards and outwards. She's happy he's the warmth, the layer of decoration keeping their lives different and interesting.

Sometimes she wonders how long it would take for them to notice a problem. She wonders how long until the shiny veneer of the heroic chief's son would peel away from the splinters.

It's just not within either of their natures to make face with a relationship issue. Astrid's too stubborn to admit that it's there and Hiccup's too nervous to bring it up.

The center of town isn't decorated so much as catered, there's a long wooden table stretching across the square, half covered in platters of mutton and fish, and half in pints of mead. Larger dragons perch on rooftops, and Terrible Terrors scurry between feet and under table licking up scraps and coaxing attention from children.

As soon as the crowd catches sight of Hiccup, there's a cheer, a rumbling stomping thing that makes Idunnr bow and Toothless grin. Astrid grasps her husband's hand a bit more tightly as he subtly shrinks back, leaning on his good leg and shifting his prosthetic back out of the spotlight.

Astrid rolls her eyes, gently tugging him forward, because she knows if she put any real force behind it he'd likely tip forward, and then really have something to be embarrassed about. It takes a minute, but Hiccup eventually looks up, waving slightly to the crowd before determinedly heading further down the hill to disappear in the masses.

"By Thor Hiccup, eager to disappear?" Astrid jokes, and Hiccup shrugs, tugging a little harder, wishing that Toothless didn't split the crowd quite so handily. "Hiccup. Hiccup, come on. Hiccup!" Astrid reaches forward, firmly grabbing his wrist and tugging him back to her, planting her lips firmly against his own. It takes a solid moment for his posture to slacken, but once it does, he pulls back with a small grin.

"Well, looks like you two haven't stopped honey-mooning." Both Hiccup and Astrid turn towards the gravelly female voice at the same time, fully expecting the long blonde hair framing Tuffnut's long lost other half.

But before Astrid can run and hug her best and only female friend, she stops, blanching and dropping Hiccup's hand like it's burning her.

Ruffnut is pregnant.

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**So it was pretty amazing getting 16 reviews for that first chapter, and even more amazing that there were so many familiar names. Is it weird if I say I missed you guys? Because I did, I missed you guys. I'm glad that you're back for more, and I plan to supply it. **

**I'd absolutely adore more feedback on this chapter, I still feel very green (frankly I'm terrified for the lemons coming up, I'm like a literary virgin again), and so any mistakes or suggestions are appreciated!**

**Thanks to: Captain Raven Rose, MysteryMan596, Hicc, The Dragon of Flames, 4ever2010, Leon Woon, xv323, Wrexie, Gentrie, Romance and Musicals, and even thought it's not what any author wants to hear, thanks for Shivakashi for taking the time to review. **

**All of you expect a reply in the near future. **

**And Guest reviews: Just a quick synopsis. I'm going to update as fast as I can write it (I'm working 30 hours a week, and in class for 8 hours a week, so…bear with me), I've been having a tough year, lacking in inspiration, and I'm glad that you remember me enough to be happy to see me! Keep reading!**

**Oh…and Chasing? I fully intend to jump back in…let's just call it a hiatus. **


	3. Chapter 3

**Sorry this took so long…I'm still here, I promise, just busy. **

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"Hey Ruff," Hiccup stutters with a blank grin as he shoves his abruptly cold hand into his pocket, stepping forward to wrap Ruffnut in a one-armed hug. She laughs and thumps him on the back in that she-Viking way that borders on pain, and his smile broadens, suddenly sincere. "Long time no see."

Ruff beams, looking around, "Doesn't look like anything has changed. You're still a twig and Astrid's still pretending like she doesn't miss me." Ruffnut waves Astrid over to the reunion with a broad grin, and it takes a minute for her to stumble over.

Ruffnut wraps an arm around each of them, tight enough to bruise, and all Astrid can feel is the round drum against her side, drowning her. She almost falls forward when Ruff finally lets go, chatting with Hiccup, grinning wolfishly as he somehow ends up in a headlock. Astrid watches his floppy hair tangling in the struggle to free himself.

Her eyes itch.

Her chest burns.

This isn't fair. It's just not.

"…don't know where she's run off to, she's been dying to see you." Hiccup is saying, his head whipping back and forth as he rocks up onto his good toes, scanning the crowd for someone. "Astrid?" It shouldn't have to be a question, but the gentle tone snaps her out of it, as her every fiber shies away from being someone who needs gentle words.

"Yeah? What?"

"Do you have any idea where Idunnr ran off to? I don't see her." The panic is just starting to register in Hiccup's voice, and Astrid frowns. She knew they shouldn't have let that damned Pinkhorn come, she's not well trained enough, and now her daughter is who knows where, chasing some dragon.

Before she can continue freaking out, a booming laugh echoes across the square, the kind of deep booming sound that can only come from Stoick the Vast. Astrid looks over towards the tallest seat at the table and catches sight of a streaming ribbon of strawberry blonde, as the chief throws her daughter up, catching her neatly and laughing again as she scampers up his arm to perch on his shoulders.

Astrid sighs, kicking herself. She needs to pull it together Thor-dammit, or she can just kiss those prayers she sent to Valhalla goodbye. Freyja and Frigg don't have any reason to even consider giving her another child if she keeps freaking out like some stupid unfit mother.

She just needs to be the best mom she can be right now, and the rest will follow. It has to, if she's perfect enough.

But it's not _fair_, Ruffnut is by no means perfect. Never has been. With her luck, she'll probably get twins.

"And that would be her," Hiccup points to the bouncing girl practicing braiding the chief's beard and Ruffnut laughs.

"Only seven years until I'm dealing with that?" Ruff rubs her distended belly, looking nervous but expertly covering the expression with a thick scowl. Astrid's eyes itch and she scratches them viciously, willing the feeling away.

Willing it to the back of her mind with the other brooding feelings of imperfection. To the drafty corridors of regret smoldering in dust behind the bright warm forefront of her thoughts.

She's not a good enough mother.

She's not a good enough wife.

If she were good enough, she'd have another baby by now.

Astrid pats Ruffnut's shoulder, equal parts bracing and comforting. There will still be other babies around to care for. Glunda is about to pop any day now, and she could always take Hiccup up on his offer to take a trip to Meathead.

But they won't be _her_ kids. They won't have Hiccup's ginger, crazy mop, and her eyes. They won't have his big clumsy feet or her love of axes.

They won't be hers, she might never get to change a diaper before dawn again, or wash what feels like a million dirty diapers.

And that's not ok with Astrid. But somehow everyone expects her to face it with the smile that she's faking.

"Two years tops, once they start walking, there's really no stopping them." Idunnr turns and looks at her mom over the crowd, spotting Ruffnut and waving frantically. Then, with a grace reminding Ruff of Astrid's younger years, the seven year old shoulder rolls down Stoick's arm, landing in a delicate crouch before springing up and running towards them.

"Nice, you taught her your shoulder roll already?" Ruffnut whistles, low and appreciative.

"I was tired of patching up skinned knees, so I figured I'd teach her how to land."

"Does she like jumping off of stuff as much as we used to?" Astrid smiles, eyes watery, as the little girl bounds into view. She stubbornly blinks away the tears, refusing to appear mopey in front of her daughter. Idunnr is old enough to know that no grown woman has the right to mope, and Astrid would prefer to keep it that way.

"More probably…Sweetie—" Before Astrid can attempt an introduction, Idunnr has struck her right hand out with a smile. Ruffnut takes her hand, charmed.

"I'm Idunnr Haddock the first. You must be my Auntie Ruffnut." Ruff returns the firm handshake, bending down a little bit to alleviate the anything but gentle tug on her arm.

"I am. It's nice to meet you Idunnr." All three adults struggle to restrain laughs in the face of such adorable maturity.

"It's nice to meet you too. I was wondering if while you're here, you'd be the fourth on our flying team. We do fun tricks and play games in the air. My daddy quit because I knocked him off of Toothless once when he sucked." Hiccup glares, silently communicating the intended secrecy of that…event.

"I'm surprised he joined in the first place, your dad was never good at sports. I remember one time when we were like 11, we dared him to climb this tiny tree—" Ruff informs, gesturing with her thumb and index finger just how tiny the tree was, making Idunnr laugh before Hiccup interrupts her with an exaggerated throat clearing.

"Ruffnut. I-is Thuggery around? I've got some important…clan stuff to discuss with him. You know diplomacy…trade…chief's son stuff…"

"Sure Hiccup, he's probably over with your dad just waiting for you to start talking about chief's son stuff," Ruff laughs. "If you're wondering, I'm not going to stop telling embarrassing stories about you," she calls after he's retreating figure.

"Oh, I know," Hiccup retorts, earning a delighted giggle from Idunnr before he disappears into the crowd.

Astrid wishes he could feel the glare on his back. The nerve. Leaving her alone with a pregnant woman.

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Ruffnut turns out to be nearly as cool as Pinkhorn when she was a hatchling, and Idunnr drags the women around all afternoon, showing her new auntie off to anyone who will listen.

Astrid's glad that Ruffnut hasn't turned into one of those whiny pregnant women who runs to the healer every time that something feels odd, but then again she doesn't know why she feared that in the first place. She feels slightly bad about this now, because pregnant Ruffnut isn't really that much different than Ruffnut minus the baby.

She cusses, well, she's been decent around Idunnr, and she blatantly checks out Viking's asses. She makes crude jokes and threatens to beat someone up for bumping into her.

Ruffnut doesn't realize how lucky that she is. It hurts to hear her reference this amazing luck so callously, but if Astrid says anything, it would force her into an explanation that she doesn't want to give.

It's one of those times that Astrid wishes screaming breaks into pillows were considered appropriate.

"If you want we could go up to the watchtower for a bit. I'm kind of done with the carnival myself, and I have laundry to do. I mean, it is out of the way but…" Astrid leans in to whisper, "honestly I'm a little worried I won't be able to get Idunnr quieted down for bed without her new favorite aunt." Idunnr stifles a yawn and pats Pinkhorn's equally droopy head as they determinedly socialize along the edge of the crowd, which is getting more intoxicated by the moment.

Also, Astrid appears to be a closet masochist, somehow vying to keep Ruffnut near, when every single little peek at her stomach is nothing but depressing.

And maybe it is dumb and hurtful, and stupid, but the insatiable craving for female companionship is dwarfing any attempt at protective rationality.

"That sounds fine, I don't really want to be around the mead anyway, since the freaking healer _forbade_ me from drinking it." Ruffnut scuffs the boot of her toe in the dirt, glaring at the ground, "And I can't even be on the ship, because even the gentlest rocking makes me barf all over the place."

"The ship part does suck, I'll give you that. But the few months without mead aren't so bad, you don't want your baby coming out looking like Tuffnut, do you?" Astrid laughs and Ruffnut agrees. "Where is Tuff, anyway? I expected you two to be attached at the hip." Ruff sighs, smiling.

Astrid smiles back, glad for the change in subject, and the detour from her own rapidly churning mind.

"He flies out every few weeks, so we still see each other. He says he doesn't know what to do with a pregnant sister, because he can't punch me, but I can beat him all I want. Apparently it's terrifying." Astrid laughs, she remembers when Hiccup was afraid of her punching him, because he thought the resulting jiggle might hurt the baby.

During the last two tries, she'd even listened to reactionary bullshit like that.

"Do you know what he's up to? I mean, I know he's apprenticing with the carpenter, and he helps out with dragon training sometimes, but I don't really see him around much." Astrid kicks a rock, sending it scuttling across the ground. Pinkhorn launches herself after it, frenzied, gnawing on it before dropping it in disappointment when it doesn't bleed.

"Eh, he's just…wasting his life for a while I guess. He's drinking too much, having a little too much fun with that crop of girls a few years younger than us." Ruffnut sighs wearily, sounding worried. If she cares half as much about her children as she does about her brother, she's going to be a great mom.

"The ones who looked at his butt?" Astrid asks with a laugh, remembering those long wintry days of frustration and learning, coupled with warm fuzzy terror.

"Apparently they still do. I just hope he chooses soon, he's going to piss some father off, toying with his dowry like this. He's going to get someone pregnant, and end up married to some wench who's going to fuck over the rest of his life—I don't know. I really don't." Astrid punches her friend gently in the arm. Ruffnut shrugs, kicking a rock that's big enough to kick up a trail of dust as it slowly tumbles off of the precarious hillside.

"I think Tuffnut is a butt. I call him Tuff-butt-head." Idunnr interjects, walking backwards in front of them and nearly stumbling.

"I like that Idunnr. I might use that when I have to insult him within earshot of my mother in law." Ruffnut laughs, silently relieved when she can see the clear silhouette of the watchtower looming on the hill above, no wonder Astrid is still so skinny, with a walk like that every day.

"He doesn't like it, he tells me that the red death is going to come back and eat me in my sleep. But I'm not scared, Pinkhorn will set its tongue on fire and it'll blow up like BOOM!" Idunnr throws dirt in the air, squealing in laughter when her Terrible Terror spooks and burps a tiny fireball.

"Astrid, your daughter is hilarious," Ruff comments with a grin, looking tired. "How the Hel do you handle all that energy?" Astrid chuckles lightly, shaking her head. She knows that Idunnr is getting tired, it just can't happen fast enough sometimes.

"Umm…shifts? Hiccup's best at nights and mornings, she likes arguing with me too damn much." Idunnr reaches the watchtower door, pulling it open and running inside, letting it slam behind her. Astrid sighs, "Like she knows she's not supposed to slam the doors, she'd never do that bullshit when Hiccup is around." They follow the little girl into the house, and Astrid shoots her daughter a look, _just because Ruffnut is here, it doesn't mean the rules don't apply. _

Idunnr looks sufficiently shamed, and stares down at her toes.

Ruffnut eases down onto a cushion on the hearth, and Astrid tries not to stare at the way the position makes her friend's stomach bulge. She defiantly looks away, crouching in front of the fireplace and blowing the ash from the coals still glowing in the very pit of the fireplace. She covers the embers with a handful of grass from the tinderbox, and it promptly starts to smoke.

Idunnr happily chats away to Ruffnut, bringing her toys out and stubbornly ignoring her steadily drooping eyelids. She stumbles a bit running across the room and floppily shoulder rolls onto the bear rug, finally just lying on her back, staring blearily at the ceiling.

"Maybe you should go to bed Idunnr." Astrid suggests, turning away from the crackling fire, to raise her eyebrows at her daughter.

"But I'm not t-t-tired." She stutters through a yawn, wiping her small grubby hands across her face.

"So you're just yawning for fun?" Astrid laughs, walking towards the center of the room and grabbing Idunnr's hands, pulling her to her feet. "Come on, it's past your bedtime, let's go." Astrid leads her toward the small bed in the corner, eventually just swinging her onto the mattress, leaning down to tug off her shoes.

"No. Mommy. No!" The little girl tugs her feet away before Astrid can tug off her stockings, and Astrid sighs, glancing at Ruffnut slightly embarrassed, doing her best to remain stern. "I'm not tired. See? I'm awake, I'm awake, just let me stay up." The stubborn face melts into tears and Astrid frowns.

"How about a bedtime story," Astrid suggests.

"No."

"How about you just lay here, but you can keep talking to us."

"No. I want to be up."

"Sweetie, it's your bedtime. Come on."

"Where's daddy?" Idunnr pouts, crossing her arms. "Daddy always tucks me in. I want daddy to tuck me in."

"He's having fun with Thuggery and his friends, he'll be back later, ok?" Astrid sighs, wishing that Hiccup were here, and regretting it. He deserves to have fun with his friends, no one has been having enough fun lately.

"I'm going to stay right here, and wait for him to tuck me in." Idunnr crosses her arms and wipes the leftover tears off of her cheeks, staring at Astrid like she's daring her mom to mention that she ever cried. Astrid smiles slightly, patting her daughter's little fists.

"Ok."

It takes all of two minutes for the girl to drift off, cuddling her pillow as the stubborn expression melts into guppy-mouthed serenity. Astrid breathes a sigh of relief, running a hand over her face before slowly standing up, doing her best not to shake the bed.

"That's normally Hiccup's job. He's better at it." Ruffnut smiles, leaning back on her hands.

"She's a handful," Ruff says, and Astrid grins exasperated, "I see why you haven't had another."

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**So…Astrid's first solo chapter…the next will be about Hiccup and how he spent his afternoon…plus why he's out so late. **

**I hope you liked the characterization, I did my best. If there's anything awful, please point it out? I still feel like a land-lubber on a pirate ship. **

**Umm…reviews! Y'all are freaking awesome! 40? For only two chapters? For me? 21 on the second chapter? **

**Damn. You guys are wonderful. Expect your PM's soon!**

**Anonymous reviewers: THANK YOU GUYS! You are so awesome, I'm glad that you like how this is shaping up, and I hope that this chapter expounds upon that. Astrid's not so much pissed, as hurt and confused…jealous. And we will see that develop…as well as some lemons coming up soon. I'm glad that everyone is glad I'm back, good to hear from adam and Hey Man…so keep reading guys. **

**Thanks to: Allied Forces, MysteryMan596, Hicc, xv323, Romance and Musicals, 4ever2010, Crashing Down Lovely, The Dragon of Flames, ketbelle, Spartan Ninja, Captain Raven Rose, Gentrie, crouchbk, ahoykailee, Chaela-laughluuurver, DEMONHEART002, SvGHobo, Mythlor**


	4. Chapter 4

**I'm baaaaaaaaaaaack….**

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Hiccup sighs as he walks through the uncomfortably parted crowd, unsure as to whether he's parting it, or Toothless is. The dragon is running in front of him, equal parts excited by the crowd and nervously protective of his master.

"Buddy, come here." Hiccup gestures with his hand and Toothless whips around, knocking two massive Vikings to the ground with his swiping tail. "Can you calm down? Just a bit? You're going to…Well, I don't really think that you're going to do anything worse than all the other dragons running around wreaking havoc…but just try and show a little dignity? Ok?" He finishes the speech by reaching out and wiping a rivulet of slobber off of the night fury's shiny black nose.

Toothless scoffs and licks his nose with his wide forked tongue, looking equal parts embarrassed and peeved.

"I know you're excited. Just don't make people regret inviting the dragons." Hiccup laughs, scratching Toothless's neck briefly. "Ok, buddy?"

Hiccup gets the feeling that the dragon is wishing he could roll his eyes.

This festival is already seeming like a generally bad idea, as everyone looks on intently, absorbing the reaction between Night Fury and man with the same wide eyes that they used to train on fights. The attention makes Hiccup blush involuntarily as he turns abruptly to the right, abandoning plans of talking to Thuggery for the much more savory thought of some quiet dark corner where no one is drowning him in uncomfortably misplaced adoration.

The crowd seems more tightly bunched somehow, and Hiccup can't help but be slightly annoyed at the impressed whispers and the people clasping his shoulders gratefully.

At least he's at eye level with most of them now, even if his waist remains about as big around as their biceps.

Except Thuggery of course, he's barely half as big around as his Meathead cohort's arm, and Hiccup does his best to puff up without holding his breath as he approaches the official but drunken group of dignitaries from Meathead and his father.

"…And then Thug, that brilliant boy, grabs the rudder and heaves, and the rocks are flying by left and right, and the ripped sail is flapping in the wind and slapping us all across the face—" The red-faced chief takes a swig of mead like he's dying of thirst before nearly collapsing into guffawing laughter.

"Well we got here alright, didn't we? And my darling Ruffnut didn't ever see it necessary to jump ship, so it was a success." Everyone chuckles, and Hiccup sidles up along his father's elbow, silently. Half of him is glad that he is no longer so small that his appearance automatically demands mocking, but the other half of him wishes he were big enough to draw attention.

Ugh, his father's going to announce him like he's twelve.

"Haha! So, Ruff is still keeping you busy then?" Hiccup attempts to announce, but all it does is cue the others to his presence.

"Hiccup! My boy! Still small but I figure dragons make up for that?" Stoick pats his son on the back with a booming ham-hock of a hand that makes Hiccup sputter.

"For those 30 turkeys my terror hunted down, I'll forgive any measure of scrawniness!" Everyone laughs, and Thuggery claps Hiccup's shoulder in a friend's welcome.

But Hiccup's question goes unanswered and men smile at him like a prodigal _child_, not as one of their own.

The conversation shifts to fishing…and hunting…and carpentry, before a brief and fascinating detour into trebuchets, before hurtling back into the depths of battle axe hurling. As much as they don't mind Hiccup being in the conversation, he doesn't have anything to say about anything.

It makes him miss Astrid, his crucial connection to the psyche of the Viking community, but it just seems _impossible_ how they once were so near to being two halves of the same whole. Now Hiccup feels lucky to be an addendum to her erratic waves of personality.

It doesn't help that everyone still treats him like a fad, the furthest possible thing from the rock that he needs to be right now.

He lingers with the men at least another few hours, even eating dinner among the but as dinner is closing up and he's sick of staring at Astrid and Ruffnut from across the town square like a love-sick thirteen year old, he stands up rather abruptly, turning and walking away from…it.

He wishes Astrid would look up and worry, that she'd see him leaving the stupid party in his honor and come with him. That they could wander the cliffs and hold hands and feel sixteen and happy again, and that seeing Astrid naked was the weightiest thing on his mind.

As he passes the edge of town, the sun is just waning, the dramatic swooped daytime arc of the Northern sun dropping behind the island, and casting a dramatic shadow across the grass that makes Hiccup look ten feet tall and twice as skinny as reality.

He wanders another half hour or so, until he comes to a familiar field, where he went on a picnic with his father and his girlfriend in a different world ages ago. A world where Astrid Hofferson wasn't yet Astrid Haddock, and he was still growing into his knobby knees.

The waning sun casts an almost eerie light over the grass different than the spring glow he remembers, but the trees still shade the same grassy spot overlooking the archipelago of boulders drifting off to the west of Berk through the channel. The only thing that's different is the noise.

Someone is drunk, that much is obvious immediately, Hiccup can smell a powerful musty sweetness of mead floating over on the breeze. Hiccup can't help but envy the group, having fun, enjoying the childish things. Surely if the entire village threw a festival in their honor, they'd be in the square enjoying—no basking—in the attention.

The fight to be normal never ends.

Most of the voices sound young, and Hiccup almost turns to leave. He's a man, a respected heir and a husband and father…no. He's not going to deal with that respectable nonsense anymore tonight, all that's got him recently is mocked by Ruffnut, with absolutely no chance of maintaining his integrity because he was too nice to make fun of a pregnant lady.

And it was totally because he is too nice, not because he's afraid of she-Viking hormones. That's insane.

Hiccup continues wandering towards the small crowd, getting close enough to smell fish over an open fire, and taste the smoke on the very back of his tongue. He's young, he'll be 25 in the spring, not exactly an old timer, he knows plenty of guys who still go to bonfires. Tuffnut does, and Snotlout did until he got married last summer. He bets that Snot would still be partying it up if his wife weren't such a hellion. Hiccup was so glad to be already married when that Icelandic tribe showed up looking for an alliance, and asking for a betrothal.

The people come into clearer focus, and surely enough, most of them appear to be younger. The truce with dragons brought some strange new generation into being, that no one was quite used to yet. Without constant dragon attacks thinning the population, elders are already living way longer than expected, and marriage is becoming less of a pressure. Hiccup has seen some girls as old as nineteen still deliberating, something that would have been completely unheard of a decade before.

Some of these rollicking teens are gathered around the fire now, passing pints of mead and ale around, looking happy and fawning over someone slightly older with long blonde hair that hangs in dramatic mats over his still skinny shoulders.

Of course Tuffnut is out here getting drunk while he and Snotlout are forced to be respectable. Lucky bastard.

Hiccup can't help but envy the utter lack of a sense of responsibility, and he stops a ways back from the ring, admiring the carefree scene. He remembers being sixteen, sneaking around with his hot girlfriend, trying not to get caught. Drinking too much and punching her father in the nose.

He wasn't sad to drop that tough guy act when Ansgar disappeared on a solo fishing trip a few years ago. Astrid was far more torn up than she thought she'd be, but Hiccup had to bite his tongue from quipping that vanishing is likely when you bring more mead than bait on a fishing trip in October.

Hiccup stops a few yards from the fire, lurking behind the crowd, unsure as to whether he's waiting for an invite or looking through a window into a room he never actually got to enter. The trip from social outcast to responsible husband sometimes feels like it happened way too fast, skipping over all of the drunken bonfires on the cliff.

He bets Astrid got to go to those. Before they even got together, he bets she was going and hanging out, and being hit on by Snotlout and every other male without a sense of self-preservation.

The people around the fire-pit look so…carefree. And something about the golden glow makes carefree look anything but the loneliness he remembers.

He's right next to the Cliffside campfire before he realizes he's continued walking, and he steps back quickly, hoping they haven't noticed him. The last thing he wants is more attention for crippling himself.

"Tuff, there's like, someone like lurking out there." A slightly whiny, but irresistibly young and feminine voice cuts through Hiccup's internal silence. "Go beat them up, it'd probably be funny."

"Gangrene, I'm not quite to that point of slobbering drunk yet. Pass the mead and I'll think it over." The girl hands Tuff jug with an unmistakable click of clay against metal, and Hiccup steps forward nervously.

He doesn't really want to fight a drunk Tuffnut. Either he wins, and is sentenced to a sober rematch or he loses and is ridiculed for getting beaten up by a drunk guy when he was perfectly sober.

Hiccup expects some sort of reaction when he steps into the light, one of those irritating murmurs of awe, given the day. If not a verbal greeting, at least a nod of acknowledgement…or something. Everyone nervously glances his way, avoiding eye contact in the same skittish way Idunnr does when he catches her mid-prank.

"I'm not a thor-damned elder for crying out loud!" Hiccup snaps, throwing his arms up in frustration. The group falls silent, until the whiny female voice breaks it.

"Shouldn't you be at your festival, Hiccup the _fearless_." She spits the endearment like a curse and looks at Tuffnut for approval. Seeing none on his blank face, she frowns and crosses her arms. Another girl across the circle smiles.

"Of course you aren't an elder Hiccup, your biceps don't look a day over twelve." Her voice is less whiny, but also somehow less pleasant, like she she's clawing her way to the top with every consonant. Tuff smiles and the circle shifts it's focus to the second girl. She smiles, sitting up straighter. "Hiccup, I'm Frostbite, why don't you sit? Have a drink." She scoots over with a languid kind of grace, more vanity than anything, leaving an open seat on the log beside her.

Something about her confidence inspires Hiccup to do what she says. It's probably just the insult, as it brings back memories of happier times, when people called him names and Astrid loved him anyway.

Sometimes, like in that painfully _adoring_ crowd today, he feels like gilded dragon dung masquerading as some great hero. Really, he's struggling not to fall apart every time Astrid frowns and Idunnr asks why.

The fire starts warming his shin as soon as he sits down and he tucks his prosthetic leg behind his other foot as subtly as he can. Frostbite rolls her eyes.

"Like hiding that thing is going to do any good, we all know about it, Mr. Celebrity."

"We've all heard how it happened like a hundred times." Gangrene chimes in, "Tuff was there." The girl must be as quick as a gronkle, she delivers the last fact like a tidbit of little known, but very sought after gossip.

"I know. I was there too." Hiccup admits dryly, much to Gangrene's amazement. Frostbite laughs and Tuff smiles absently.

"Ah, the days before responsibility. All we had to do was save the world." Tuff says, dreamy eyed and nostalgic, while Hiccup rolls his eyes.

"Hardly." _Everyone deals with the lull after greatness differently_, Hiccup repeats the mantra to himself. It's something that Astrid came up with, trying to talk everyone out of erecting a statue of Hiccup in the town square.

And sitting here in Tuffnut's aura of eternal youth , it's never seemed more true. Tuff basks in the glory, ignoring the fact that it went stale years ago, while Hiccup does his best to ignore the fact that it ever happened.

Tuffnut's way does seem a lot happier. And a lot less stressful.

Hiccup looks at Gangrene who is possessively hugging Tuff's arm, every bit as blissfully possessive as Astrid used to be.

Hiccup misses the days when Astrid would have followed him out here just to pummel any girl who glanced at him. Then again, it never seemed she had enough chance, only Ruffnut ever really glanced, and even then it was only a glance. Albeit an iron-fisted glance…

"Why aren't you at your festival Hiccup? I mean the whole village came out in their finest mead-stained party clothes." Frostbite's tone is comfortingly dry and Hiccup wonders how he could have possibly thought she sounded malicious earlier.

"Ah, the real question should be, if it's my festival, why doesn't it matter to everyone that I left?" Hiccup asks, knowing it was never his festival. If it were his festival, it would be nonexistent.

The only way he'd want a freaking festival is if he were still basking in the glory of being 14. And he's definitely not, fourteen sucked. He lost his leg and was shorter than Astrid and everyone tried to murder his best friend.

But sitting here, feeling old, is leaving a hollow chasm where the memories of carefree youth should be. Then again, he isn't _old_, and maybe it isn't too late to fill in that gap.

00000

The camaraderie is abrasive at best, the mead potent enough to make his knees wobble and his head feel delightfully absent, and as the sunlight dims completely Hiccup is for once content.

Gangrene's voice is annoying, and the his prosthetic digs into his stump a little harshly, but Frostbite seems more open than he originally thought, tethering him to the conversation.

"So…what do you ladies say? Move this to the beach…" Tuffnut rubs his hands together as he slurs, eliciting a giggle from Gangrene.

Frostbite rolls her eyes.

"What do you say Hiccup? Beach?" From the side, Frostbite almost looks like a younger Astrid, before her face had narrowed. The thick blonde hair falling in curtains, glimmers the same way in the orange glow, but one look down at her girlish arm dispels the illusion.

The thought of confusing the two of them makes Hiccup sick, and he reels backwards, lurching to his feet.

"I've got to get going." He mumbles, running a finger through his hair. It's warm from sitting near the fire and he can feel it standing straight up as he drags his hand haphazardly to the side.

"Come on, the beach is great this time of night." Frostbite smiles, and Hiccup hates the part of him that wants to go along.

"Idunnr…I've got to get home." He sighs, hating how he _sounds. _Hating how he doesn't want to go home right now.

"Right, wife and kids, the daily grind." Frostbite smiles, pitying, and Hiccup shrugs, feeling six inches tall.

That girl has a way of worming under people's skin. Like a skin disease.

He wishes the rash weren't a relief.

He shakes his head, waving goodbye as he turns and heads up towards the watchtower, shuffling for a combination of reasons he doesn't dare flesh out in his mind.

He's cold by the time he reaches the watchtower, and the froth of wood smoke curling out of the chimney is beyond comforting.

He tells himself that he loves being home. He really does.

The door opens with an uneven creak, and he cringes, stepping inside as silently as he can before easing the door closed.

"She's out. I don't think Ragnarok would wake her at this point." In the firelight, he hadn't even noticed Astrid curled on the couch, hands around a steaming mug.

"Hey, I thought you'd be asleep." Hiccup rubs the back of his head sheepishly, smiling in a way he hopes is endearing.

"Couldn't fall asleep. Honestly, I mostly just missed your freakishly warm feet." Astrid looks away as she says it, Hiccup sighs.

"I'm sorry—"

"Don't apologize, I'm glad you had fun. It's nice to see you…enjoying…stuff…" Astrid trails off awkwardly, and Hiccup thinks, not for the first time, that he's rubbed off on her too much.

"Yeah…today was fun." Hiccup bites his lip.

"There's another cup of tea on the hearth. It might be cold now though."

"Thanks," Hiccup shuffles over to the hearth and picks up the cup, thumbing the earthenware texture with a pensive thumb.

He sets the cup on the mantle, setting his jaw, before crossing the room and kissing his wife hard on the mouth. She fumbles her cup, and it clanks onto a table top with a clunk and a slosh before her arms clamp around his neck so tight he can't breathe, and he doesn't want to.

It's harsh and urgent, all teeth and tongue as she pulls him on top of her, shoving his pants down with fingers that dig into his hips. He sucks hard enough on the side of her neck to leave a bruise and pulls back when she shoves her hand down his shorts, moaning against his hair with a tone that makes him hard instantly, and he bucks against her stomach, nearly whimpering with the overload of it all.

Gods, last night was years ago. It was decades.

"Clothes." Astrid grumbles, squirming and shoving her quilt to the floor haphazardly. "Take…off…they need to be off." She nearly whines, and Hiccup has enough left of himself to laugh lightly. Astrid pinches his ass viciously and he gasps.

"Fine…" He struggles with the waistband of her leggings, shoving her skirt up and out of the way, running eager fingers over her stomach. "Clothes off…Just stop with the pinching."

"Hurry…" Astrid somehow gets his underwear off with her frankly freezing feet and tugs her towards him just as he manages to get her pants off of one leg.

They meet with a blissful silky squelch, moaning into each other's necks. Hiccup bucks with an unknown fervor, each motion met with a breathy gasp and a tightening of Astrid's fists in the wool of his shirt.

It doesn't take long, until she bites her lip with a muffled groan and Hiccup seizes up, rocking forward hard one last time.

"Love you, Hiccup." Astrid nuzzles against his deflated shoulder, kissing the his collarbone with a sleepy smile on her voice.

"Love you too." Hiccup answers, relieved.

Toothless is hanging from the rafters, snoring loudly, as he carries her to bed.

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That first time.

Hiccup can't help it, he knows it's not healthy but the whole goddamn incident runs through his mind on a loop. That's not going to help anything, he knows that it's not, but he just can't help but wonder if that's the one he should have handled differently.

That first one stands out in his memory, such horror springing from a day so close to ordinary. He remembers coaxing Astrid to stay in bed, he remembers the rounded drum of her stomach, firm and alive and comforting.

He remembers the ice storm the night before, the freezing rain plastering itself to the window shutters of the watchtower in stubborn, thick sheets of diamond that refused to peel off even when Astrid pounded on them as hard as she could.

Astrid finally went outside, battle axe in hand to chop at the ice, and came back in a few minutes later, snow drenched with a bruised ego from when she fell on the ice. She swore she barely bumped her stomach, and he cuddled her chilled body close, coaxing her out of her sopping clothes and into his embrace.

She lost it later that afternoon.

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**So, I gotta say a couple things guys. **

**First, I've missed you all so much, and I hope you're still reading this! I can't even express how cramped by right brain has been stuffed up in my skull for nearly an entire semester of freaking engineering school. Damn my love for biomechanics. **

**Second. This would have come earlier, but I got a lot more negative feedback on his little brainchild than I'm used to, and I'm afraid to say I kind of handled it like a little brat. **

**So I'd like to address that. First, to the people who say that I'm introducing drama where it's not needed. If you don't like it, don't read it, I didn't exactly want to write a story about holding hands and being sexy mid-twenty year olds with a perfect family life. And plus, isn't that kind of what author's do? Introduce conflict to characters? Anyway, I totally respect (honestly!) the people who criticize this for lack of subtlety, and while I hope they'll give me a chance (lots of subtlety to come!) I'm going to write this story. **

**And I like it.**

**So that's good.**

**And also, yes, the medical jargon of this story isn't accurate in the slightest. (Again, it will be addressed, it's not like medieval healers really knew what they were talking about, and as you'll see, they're super wrong). And I'm writing on the assumption that Astrid's skinny hips are an issue in the whole child bearing thing. **

**I hope to be great someday, and that someday is when I get back into Chasing Thunderstorms. But I need a warm-up. And I want to write this story, just the way I have it planned. **

**If you like it, I would adore any feedback you might have. If my writing sucks, or I get something wrong, feel free to encourage me to correct it. I'd love any feedback you all give. Just know, if you feel the need to flame, or correct my admittedly incorrect medical information or introduction of conflict, I will promptly cry, eat seven brownies, and be over it. **

**I hope to hear back! And I hope you guys like the little bit of lemony sumptin sumptin. **


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